Me -Sam, seriously, I’m worried… IT’s not working.
Sam-What’s not working?
Me -My…you know what. SHE’s not working.
Sam- Just get your hoo-hah back in the game !
Me – Ok. You are not listening. None of the norms is working. It’s like she’s making demands in order to turn on!
Sam- Like good conversation, connection and a ROTH IRA?
Me- YESssSs!!! I don’t feel like I should have to negotiate my hook-ups with her! She/IT/THAT doesn’t even have a face!
Sam- Hate to tell ya, but your vagina is a Zombie Twat.
Me – What!?
Sam- A Zombie Twat. Half-dead and requires BRAINS.