A valentine to a crush – from an honest wallflower

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Dear Crush,
I need to apologize. As you know, the last few times we’ve spoken, it has been a bit awkward. Frankly, I’ve exhibited as much charm and grace as an earthworm in a glass of milk.

The reason I find myself mentally impaired around you is due to your glittering smile and my esteem for you. I think you are cool & fun, and I would like to hang out with you some time.

But considering how nervous I am around you, I can’t promise I won’t get tongue tied and exclaim my favorite color is potato or something.

You seem really nice… and what I’m trying to say is… my Dad dropped me on my head as a child.

You’re welcome and happy cupid day.

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