At least it’s… Natural

Friends,

There comes a point in the female (sexual) hunger-cycle where a gal decides to just starve for a while.

After awhile it becomes – the Numb Stage.

In the Numb Stage, the longer you go without sex, wild things occur! You get smarter, you read books, you begin wearing comfy-practical clothes and give the zombie look when your friends discuss their exploits.

The most recent case of this condition was discovered in a conversation with Reed and Melanie by the pool.

We went around the table and conducted catch-up talk and sipped margaritas out of Solo cups.

Catch-up talk turned to count-down talk, as we all were circling the (Numb Stage) drain.

Reed – It’s been two weeks since I’ve …

Me – Shut it! Try six weeks! Ugh… and my wax is tomorrow.

Reed- So?

Me – Waxing always wakes her up!

Reed – (laugh) Don’t go to the appointment.

Me – Oh hush it mistress of the night. You know I have too. If I miss my appointment, I won’t be able to get in.

Mel – (laughing) Into your whoo-hah or into the Spa.

Me – (laughing) BOTH!

Melanie – Y’all…Embrace it. The numb stage is great. Everything is clearer.

Me – Mel, how long has it been?

Melanie – Oh, like six months. (Reed and I look at her shocked ) I hadn’t done THAT since “Crazy-Tom.”

Me – eh ? Crazy -Tom?

Reed – (to me) You called him Franken-Weiner.

Me – Ohhhhh!!! Ha ! The guy that canceled the date because it got it caught in his zipper! Blahahahahahah. Good ol Zipper Dick ruined your game ?!?

Melanie – Yes! But it’s fine..I’m peaceful and I’m clearer.

Reed – (to me) Speaking of clear…are you going to wax it ?

Mel – Retro is in. You could fro it out..

Me- Natural ? Oooh. Noooo.

Reed- Natural is one thing, and not finding the clit through the trees is another.

Mel – blahahahah.

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