A modern day West Side Story

Tammy came up to me and with a startled look said, ” You will never believe what just happened!!!??!”

T: This WOMANNN ( as she moves her hands wildly) comes up to me and asks me if I’ve been seeing Eddie and then informs me that she came here to get him and she’s in his bed and…

Me: (interrupting) Wait, what woman? What kind of chick was this?

T: I don’t know some WOMAN with a thick accent and from South America or South Columbia or something, I don’t know…she comes up to me and says, ‘Excuse me, are ju Tammy?’ I nod. The she says, “I know who ju been with. I know you know Eddie. Ju need to know that I am here from, a-far-a-away and for him. And now, ju know that he and I are together. Jes, what I am saying is that I am with him. In his bed. With him.”

Me: Holy Sh*t.

T: What the hell was that?!

Me: I guess he likes imported women?

T: (still shaken) (nods)

Me: “Are ju Tammy?” Blahahahahahah. OMG.

T: He told me he’s going camping this weekend.

Me: Do you think he’s taking her, or does he just leave her in his bed?

T: Oh I think she’s going.

Me: (in an accent) “Oh jes I’m going a-how-ju-say, camping. Because in my Country, if I want do something dirty, I-a- take it outside.”

T: (laughing)


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